Top 10 Female Video Game Characters I’d Marry

Two weeks ago I did a Top 10 featuring the 10 female characters in gaming I’d have a one-night stand with. This Top 10 is different, these girls are not just a fling for me. If these girls were real, I’d be more than happy to spend the rest of my life with each and every one of them. They are a perfect mixture of beauty and personality. They’re not just girls I can see myself hanging out with a lot, they’re girls that if the stars all aligned, I’d be willing to take a shot at seeing where things would go in a serious relationship.

A side note as well here, just like with the Top 10 Sleep With list, I have certain rules that apply to the girls on this list. In the Sleep With list, a lot of the girls on it applied because I knew for fact that a relationship would not be possible with them, for reasons such as their lifestyles, personalities or the simple fact they’d kill me if I got close. On this list, the girls I’m placing in are being set aside from the conflicts/battles they may fight in their respective material. I’m putting them on this list as if they were just real people in our world, void of aliens, monsters, wars, etc.

Now once again, let’s remember that this is all my personal opinion here. My tastes in women are far different than all of your tastes, so there are going to be characters you’ll agree with, others you’ll have no idea why I picked her out. So while you’re welcome to comment on this list, you’re wasting your time and energy arguing my list when it’s who I am into, not you.

And most importantly, for all the SJWs and such out there, these characters are not real, so relax if I start to talk about how sexy a character is or something to that extent, I’m not a sexist pig, I promise you that. Also, don’t give me the creepy speech, every single one of you fantasize about being with someone that you know you’ll never have whether they’re purely fictional or celebrities.

Anyway! So keeping it down to one character per game (as much as I want to list the entire Persona 4 cast), let’s get to it!

10

Starting off our list is a beautiful computer scientist who immediately strikes off the “intelligence is sexy” box on the checklist. With Shion drastically changing throughout the Xenosaga series, I’m personally selecting the Shion from the first game where she’s far less bitchy and a Lightning-esque royal pain in the ass by the end of the series. Shion caught my attention very early on in the first game, being a female protagonist and not being a crazy badass warrior was a new idea to me, and I connected with her character a lot faster because of that. While she’s got some real personal issues from her past and in the first game she can still be rather bossy, I love the calmer, more innocent side to her and I can see that translating very well into her if she was real in the present day.

Also god damn I’d be living the rich life with her, with that brain of hers working into computer engineering, you know she’s making a crazy good paycheck.

09

Nel immediately checks off a bunch of boxes for me. Red hair, super athletic, strong woman and her voice is just angelic. I just have to be careful not to call her a “chick”, I might get in serious trouble for that. Nel for me when playing Star Ocean: Till the End of Time, while being a badass secret agent, she gives off a very calm vibe to me. I feel like if she wasn’t having to sacrifice herself for her country and Queen, she’d be a very chill person to hang around. And given her loyalty, you know that if there was a mutual love between the two of us, I’d be very confident that she’d never cheat.

I’d just have to make sure she isn’t allowed to hold a knife unless she’s cooking up something. Can’t have her walking around with two bladed objects. Someone’s gettin’ hurt!

08

She’d be far higher on this list if it weren’t for the fact that she’s such a tough character to judge, it’s hard to tell how she’d act given her personality and her thievery in Chrono Cross. But as one of my first video game crushes, I just can’t in good conscience leave Kid off this list. Everything’s perfect, I love the hair, those blue eyes, her outfit fits her body type perfectly, even the white marking on her face and arms add to the beauty she has. But most of all, god damn I love her Australian accent that she has in the English version of the game. It makes me wish we’d get a remake of this game with voice acting, I want to hear what this would actually sound like.

I just better not piss her off, cause then she’ll kick me arse so hard, I’ll kiss the moons!

07

I find that taking this Final Fantasy VII character is going to rub a lot of people the wrong way. “Aerith is such a cutie!” “Tifa’s best babe, bro!”. Honestly to me, Aerith is annoying and Tifa while she’s an interesting character, the fact everyone looks at her as a sex symbol with her constantly growing giant tits (via fanart) just turns me off. People find Yuffie annoying, but me? I love that hyper personality of hers. She’s a real cutie and her super-happy-go-lucky attitude just pops for me. She is super pretty, those short shorts and the boots are just awesome. And like I said, her personality just comes off as we’d be having so much silly times together and if you’ve been reading some of my articles, you know I love cheesy fun.

I hope she doesn’t steal anything of mine though. Granted, it’s not materia, so I should be fine.

06

If there’s any great choice for a Top 10 Female Video Game Characters I’d Marry list, a girl from the Harvest Moon series works perfectly, given you can marry them in-game. Harvest Moon 64 has always been my favourite game in the series, so going with my wife from that game, Karen was an easy pick for this list. Granted, at the beginning of the game, she is a completely total bitch, she’s super distant and when there are 4 other girls to choose from (well 3, I hated Popuri), it’s really easy to just leave her and go after one of the other bachelorettes. But Karen gave off a very soft side to me when I first starting talking with her, I felt there was something much deeper going on that she wasn’t telling me. And once you get past her barriers you really do see that wonderful side of her. Being able to convince her to marry me in the game was very rewarding and seeing how she is in full wife mode shows to me that she’d be an awesome person to be with. Also, in terms of her looks, the highlights in her hair easily caught my attention early on and afterwards her style pretty much made her the only option for me as everyone else either walked around in dresses or in Ann’s case, overalls. Karen was the only one who looked modern.

The only thing that would be interesting is her wine-connoisseur history. I’m straight-edge so there’d be a lot of wine bottles just sitting on the shelf.

05

There’s a lot of things about Fetch that if we kept the entire setting from her world around, she’d be nowhere on the list. But as a person, she far exceeds the expectations I have for someone to make this list. Taking away her powers, I am confident she wouldn’t have become the drug addict she becomes before the events of Infamous: First Light, taking away the real problem I’d have with her. With that aside, she’s such a pretty girl, the punk style is always a plus for me and personality-wise, she seems like such a super-cool person to hang around. You take away the bullshit she’s been put through throughout her backstory before the games, you know she’s just a super down-to-earth, fun-loving punk rock girl. And for me, that is just freaking awesome!

04

The reason for Final Fantasy X-2 ver. Yuna was selected #1 for the Top 10 Sleep With list, Rikku was my first legitimate video game crush. Her character shines in the first FFX game, she is just an absolute joy to be around. She actually reminds me a lot of my current girlfriend of 8 years now, she’s got a similar small frame, she’s got that cute girl attitude of hers and most of all, she waves her hands about when she speaks (it’s weird how much Rikku and my girlfriend are alike). I specifically prefer her from the original game and not X-2 because of her outfit, the bikini set and mini-skirt just kind of ruined the cute girl Rikku I love. Not to mention it breaks your immersion when she’s dressed like that and they’re walking around on a snowy mountain. I’m not complaining about being able to see my first game crush in a cute little bikini, but I prefer the orange top and those wonderful green shorts as common wear easily.

03

If not for the reveal of what she looks like under that helmet and especially since she looks almost 100% human, Tali might not have made this list, even though she is just one of the best personalities I can think of in video games period. Yet hats off to Tali for making the vast majority of Mass Effect players for keeping her in their minds as the best girl, even before we even knew what she looked like under the suit. She has that effect (pun intended) on people through her just wonderful personality, she can be extremely cute, very funny, super serious all at the same time, whenever the situation suits itself. And when she’s shaped so well and fits into her bio-suit as perfect and tightly she does, it’s a match made in heaven. People were really upset when it was revealed what she looked like under the helmet however, because she was a human with some markings and other little things going on. Personally, it just makes it so much easier to have her on this list. No chance of tentacles or any weird shit.

And the best part? Even if she gets mad at me and calls me a bosh’tet, I’ll still laugh and think she’s adorable.

02

If there’s anything in either video games or anime that will immediately get my attention with a female character, it’s when she starts off as a male in disguise. Characters like Charlotte Dunois from Infinite Stratos and Hotaru Tachibana from Aoharu x Machinegun come to mind. But Naoto Shirogane is in a league of his/her own. She is an absolutely perfect blending of all the things I’ve talked about on the list so far. Intelligence, good looks (even when she’s dressed like a boy) and that shyness that hides another side of her that she rarely shows to anyone. The most intriguing part about Naoto however is how she would actually handle a relationship, as when dealing with such in Persona 4, she clearly can’t handle the flood of emotions right off the bat, which makes this cold, calculated detective turn from a tough nut to crack to the cutest pile of mush you’ve ever seen. And who can resist that level of adorable?

It’s a win-win, she looks cute dressed more masculine and extremely hot when she dresses feminine. No complaints either way from me.

And finally, my #1 pick for my fictional waifu!

01

Here’s the weird thing that happened with this list. I had Rikku #1 and Fuuka #4. As I was writing Fuuka’s paragraph, I stopped and thought about it for a second. And that’s when I realized something super mind-blowing to me:

Rikku is my personal favourite and that may never change. But taking everything into account, I truly believe that the best choice out of the 10 girls on this list to become my real-world wife would actually be Fuuka.

Like Naoto, she’s that perfect blend of intelligence, looks, personality, the whole package. But unlike the runner-up detective, Fuuka has that last piece to the puzzle that no one else comes close to. When you watch her, how she acts, how she speaks, she gives off that perfect wife vibe, it’s hard to give it a single word kind of description. Some of the girls on this list are super hyper, can be a little bossy, or may just have a bit of an edge on them. Fuuka on the other hand is just a calm and cute girl who you can absolutely see yourself coming home to and just snuggling up on the couch with after a tough day.

People when they make lists like this often go for the obvious. The super good-looking, the ones who they’d look forward to sleeping with every night. With me and Fuuka however, it’s not because I’d look forward to sleeping with her every night, but sleeping next to her every night. And because of that, she’s my #1 candidate for a potential perfect marriage if she was ever to exist.

I hope you all enjoyed this list as much as I enjoyed making it, this was a far tougher list to develop. It’s a lot easier to come up with a list just for sex, but a serious relationship?! That takes some real thought!

 

 

One comment

  1. […] all, I did list her on my Top 10 Video Game Girls I’d Marry list. While Nel is a very serious girl, when she’s not playing the loyal soldier role, I feel […]

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