Saturday Morning Rant: Nintendo NX Rumours

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Dear Nintendo,

How are you folks doing over there in Japan? Are you doing well? I hope you are, because I want to ruin your good day right about now.

I love you guys, I really do. You were a huge part of my childhood with the Super Nintendo and Nintendo 64 consoles I used to own as a kid. I can vividly remember playing Super Mario World, Donkey Kong Country and Super Smash Bros. for hours and hours on end, enjoying every single moment of it.

But let’s be honest here, you have not been at your best in a long time, I’d argue you haven’t been at your best since before the new millennium. Some would argue on the side of the Gamecube but for me personally, I believe your last great console was the N64. Now I’m not saying the Wii wasn’t a success, it was a massive success, I cannot deny that. But in terms of your game quality, you have not been putting out your best work in a long, damn time.

I thought you would’ve learned from the WiiU, that gimmicks only work once before the casual audience gets tired of it. But now I’m hearing that your upcoming console, the Nintendo NX, which a while ago I specifically said that in order to get the company back into the console war and not just in a long distant third place, you needed to go back to your roots and just create a console much like the Super Nintendo, just a console that plays good games, nothing more and nothing less. But instead, if I’m to believe the rumours starting to circulate about your new console, you couldn’t help yourself, could you Nintendo? You had to make a gimmicky console again, didn’t you?

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Seriously Nintendo?! A portable console?! Wasn’t that kind of what the WiiU aimed to be, a way for kids to still play their games while their parents wanted to watch TV? Didn’t that fail miserably? So why are you (possibly) making a console that’s a step further in that direction? What makes you think that this is going to catch on, when the WiiU failed to do so?

I’ve been a console gamer my entire life, Nintendo, I’ve been there since the SEGA Genesis, all the way to my current PlayStation 4. I don’t understand why you can’t grasp why the current generation of consoles in the Xbox One and leading PS4 are more successful than yours. A console system is meant to be a standstill object that plugs into a TV, not something you can carry around the house, that’s what a handheld system is for and you’ve got that market dominated with the 3DS. No one wants to play a console-level game like your upcoming Zelda game on a 10-inch screen, they want to play it on their big-screen TVs. If we wanted to play a game on a small screen, we’d pull out our 3DS and do it there.

I don’t understand what everyone’s fascination is with the mobile gaming market. I’ve played a ton of games on my phone over the years and with the best game I’ve played on it, I can still count on my two hands how many hours I’ve sunk into the game. Mobile games currently and for the foreseeable future are not going to be huge gaming experiences, you can’t have a Persona 5 or a Destiny on a mobile device, you just can’t. This whole portable market does not work with the quality of games that console games are. It’s not to say the mobile market is useless, but I think we need to lower its spot on the totem pole just a little bit.

Once again Nintendo, I think the problem you’re having lies within your stubbornness on sticking with more gimmick-driven consoles. I’m not saying the portable console is the worst idea ever, but given your current situation, this is not the route to go. I truly do believe that just making a gaming console, nothing more, that’s the way to go. Allow third-party publishers to get back into the fray. Do you think Ubisoft wouldn’t like another platform to sell the next Assassin’s Creed on, do you think Activision wouldn’t like one more platform for Call of Duty to make bank on? Of course they would, but your consoles are always so complicated and full of gimmicky bullshit that it’s too much of a hassle for them to port their games onto your system. Just make a simple console that they can easily port their games onto and your game library will increase exponentially! I’m not saying you should never make a gimmicky console ever again, but for fuck’s sake, go back to something normal for a while so your fanbase can have a better selection of games than just X-Nintendo title once ever six months!

THAT'S THE ENTIRE CALENDER FOR WIIU ON METACRITIC!!!

THAT’S THE ENTIRE CALENDER FOR WIIU ON METACRITIC!!!

I’m sorry Nintendo, I really am, but until you prove to me that you’re willing to make a console where you’ll actually have games for me to play ever month or two instead of maybe two purchases a year, I have zero interest in whatever it is that you’re making. I made that mistake twice, first with the Wii and now with the WiiU. I love games like Bayonetta 2, Tokyo Mirage Sessions, Mario Kart 8 and many more, but man do I feel stupid when I pay several hundred dollars on your console and I buy maybe one game a year for it now. Your selection ranges from shitty kids games to not-so-shitty kids games, you have a distinct lack of mature games when it doesn’t take a fucking genius to see that your core fanbase are adults. You have amazing franchises but aren’t making games for them unless their name is Mario, how in the holy hell did we never get a single WiiU Metroid game, Nintendo?!

Your focus has clearly drifted away from your main fanbase in hopes of courting the casual fanbase. You know, the ones who bought the Wii. Here’s the thing about that fanbase, Nintendo and I hope your writing this one down: They aren’t consistent. They never have been and never will be. That purchase works once and then they’re gone. You can’t expect people that aren’t hardcore gamers to buy everything you release, that just doesn’t happen. They look at something trendy, buy it and then move onto the next thing, you will never be able to keep them in your grasp. Stop alienating the people that brought you to the dance and start paying attention to them again. Make that fourth installment in the Metroid Prime series, start making your console more inviting to third-party publishers so games like The Witcher and Mass Effect can be played on it. And for fuck’s sake, just go back to a normal controller! That WiiU GamePad is the most awkward fucking thing to play with and I remember the N64 controllers!

So come on, Nintendo. Pull your heads out of your asses and get back in the game. We don’t want you to go away, but if you keep ignoring us like this and continue to make really bad decisions, you’re going to end up like SEGA. And no one wants Mario to be where Sonic is right now.

2 comments

  1. An interesting take on the rumours. I found myself agreeing with you as much as I was disagreeing with you! Completely with you on they need to get more developers on board and they did screw up with the Wii U, my main argument which corresponds to some of what you said is they completely misunderstood the Wiis user base and didn’t look into who actually owned a Wii, thinking those who did would naturally transfer over to the Wii U and understand what it is. The marketing and communication surrounding the Wii U was terrible. What I disagree with is your point about making a standard, “normal” console. With two established “run of the mill” consoles already out with large user bases, Xbox One and PS4, if another similar console was released I can’t see people willing to get the NX if it was a standard console. It would have to be technologically impressive and advanced and stand out, something I not sure Nintendo could financially produce especially if it failed. The NX needs to be a bit different, the Wii U wasn’t a bad console but Nintendo never really fully committed to it or its unique features. While I don’t want the NX to be gimmicky I do want it to stand out and offer something a bit different.

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    1. CSRadical · · Reply

      It could benefit by being a little different than the other two consoles. But I also look at their games as being able to sell themselves above the Xbox One and quite possibly the PS4. If all three consoles were released the same day and had the same specs, I truly believe Nintendo wins with the better exclusives.

      Like

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