It’s week #17 of Waifu, Friend With Benefits or One-Night Stand!
For those new to the article, this is not a post that talks about the “fuckability” of three randomly selected female characters from various anime and video games. I’m already attracted to them, it’s to be implied that I would share a bed with them already. What this article is meant to do, is go through their personalities, interests, anything pertinent to answering the question if they’re a one-time only, a friend that I might accept the occasional booty call from, or someone I would absolutely spend the rest of my life with.
And for the love of god, please take into account that if these girls are underage, I’m not implying that if say I give a 14 year-old the One Night Stand decision, that means at her canon age is when I want to participate in such acts with. I’m in my late twenties, I’m aware of the law, I’m not that stupid, nor that disgusting. Come on, folks, use your brains!
So without further to do, let’s meet this week’s contestants!
Kicking off this week is quite possibly my favourite tomboy in both gaming and anime combined, Chie Satonaka from Shin Megami Tensei: Persona 4. This kung-fu movie lover and devourer of meat (particularly steak) is a great example of a character with multiple layers to her character and yet doesn’t suffer from the usual character flaw of being too depressing, as a ton of Japanese games’ characters tend to suffer from. She’s easily the most upbeat and energetic of all the girls in the game, being the one who wants to cheer everyone up even when they’re at their darkest moments. Granted, she has a bit of a short fuse, but when you have to deal with someone like Yosuke on a daily basis, I’d have a short fuse too.
But what really makes Chie such an interesting girl is actually her biggest insecurity. Obviously the classic idea for an attractive girl is a pretty girl with long hair, little bit of makeup, cute personality, maybe a little shy and likes cute things. Chie on the other hand (while still a pretty girl) has short hair, doesn’t appear to wear much makeup, is very brash and very outgoing, loves badass movies, loves eating meat and unless she’s in her school uniform, she tends to dress a little boyish, no dresses, no frilly clothes, nothing that you’d call cute per se. So because of who she is, she gets it in her head that she’s not at all attractive to the other boys, to the point that even when there are guys who secretly think she’s very cute (because she is!), her brash personality makes it difficult for them to approach her. It’s really sad in the early going of the game to see this girl, who from the very beginning I thought was the prettiest, think she’s undesirable. It makes you want to give her the biggest possible hug.
And I think that’s what makes me so interested in her. Take away the insecurities and you’ve got a girl who doesn’t care about being a traditional pretty girl and forcing herself to become someone she isn’t. She’s more than happy to just be herself and because of that, she comes off the most real from the very start. She’s not hiding anything in terms of her looks or her personality, what you see is what you get.
So here’s my decision on Chie, which should surprise no one:
♥ WAIFU ♥
I’ve always loved Chie since first being exposed to her in the original PS2 classic. I’ve always had a thing for tomboys because they’re always so easy to associate with, to see eye-to-eye with. You don’t have to change up your personality to match up with them, you can just a guy around them and it’s so much fun to just shoot the shit with a girl when in many cases, you have to filter yourself. In Chie’s case, how could I not get along with someone who wants to watch movies of people kicking ass, while eating a damn good steak? And when she’s still as pretty as she is, there’s just the biggest possible bonus on top of Chie with her already fantastic personality.
Konosuba is a show full of female characters that are very hard to attach to in terms of anything other than their looks. The majority of them in terms of personality are almost unlikable. Out of the main case, Megumin’s easily the closest to a sane person and that’s saying something for a chuunibyou girl who only uses the most powerful and dangerous magic spell of them all.
Oddly enough, as hard as it is to believe, Megumin’s actually a really smart girl, the problem is that the part of the brain where the knowledge lies isn’t the highest on the priority list to power on. What’s the highest priority, you ask? The part of the brain that doesn’t give a shit about anything, so long as she gets to use her daily Explosion spell on something. She has very little self-control with that spell, having the itchiest trigger-finger to use the spell. Though to her credit, there are times where she uses it at the right times, a loyal girl so when her friends are threatened, she’ll act as soon as she can.
Megumin’s such a multiple personality type of girl. On a normal day, she’s actually quite calm and happy, a lot like Rikka Takanashi from Chuunibyou demo Koi ga Shitai, who I compare her a lot too. Like Rikka as well, she can go from a cute normal girl to being very childish and hyper at the drop of a pen, over-the-top gestures, crazy monologues, all that over-dramatic jazz. She also has quite the reputation of getting super crazy and aggressive without any warning, but in particular when you comment to her about being a tiny girl, or even worse, referring to her as a loli.
All right, here’s Megumin’s spot:
♦ FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS ♦
I don’t think I’d be able to put up with Megumin every single day, but I’d certainly be open to the idea of meeting up with her every once in a while as a friend, particularly when she’s already hit her daily spell quota. She’s a cute girl and seems really fun to be around, at least when she’s not completely off her rocker. I also imagine if I get her away from the other girls like Darkness and Aqua, she might be a little more chill as well, she seems to be at her most devious and childish when around those two. But hey, I’ve always been able to enjoy smaller girls, who’s to say Megumin would be no different?
One of my favourite shows from the Summer season was Netoge or the full-english name, And You Thought There is Never a Girl Online?, which is an amazing name for an anime by the way. There’s quite a few fantastic female characters in this show and the first one up for debate from the show is Akane, the secret closet otaku of the show.
Originally, Akane is your classic popular girl, she’s very cold and rude to pretty much everyone not in her circle of friends, playing the game of “You’re not on my level or in my league.” to everyone, especially those who are considered otaku boys and girls, those who play games, watch anime, read manga, all that jazz. But because it wouldn’t be any fun to leave her at that, it turns out she actually is a massive otaku, probably bigger than most of the ones she’s rude towards at school. She’s merely trying to separate her school life from her life at home in the most extreme way possible. But in reality, she’s a giant nerd like the rest of us.
She’s very insecure and sensitive about her gamer and otaku central secret life, willing to kick the everloving shit out of someone if they try to spill the beans on her secret. But when you’re in that bubble of hers and she’s finally calmed the fuck down, she’s actually a very sweet and caring girl, though still extremely shy and with a short fuse still. Once you’re a friend of hers, she’ll go out of her way to help you whenever and however she can, without hesitation.
I can’t think of much more at this point, so here’s my call on Akane:
♦ FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS ♦
I think she’s very much Waifu material, she’s a sweet girl and being an otaku, it’s very easy for us to associate a lot of things together. But the problem I have with her that keeps me from going that far is the fact that she wants to live a life away from the otaku culture she loves so much when she’s in public. If she’s that embarrassed and ashamed of who she is, what could happen if she’s in a relationship with someone like me who has zero problem saying I’m a huge gamer and anime consumer? I’ve had a relationship where my girlfriend didn’t want her parents to know I existed and it wasn’t fun having that fact running through my head constantly. I don’t want to risk having that happen again, so unfortunately for Akane, her failure to fully accept who she is makes it impossible for me to consider her for the highest position on this stage.
So that’s this week’s edition of Waifu, FWB, or One-Night Stand, hope you enjoyed it! Leave any comments you’ve got below, whether it’s your own choices between the three or maybe I’m missing something that could’ve turned the tide on my decision with any one of these girls.