Tag Archives: Guilty Gear

Game Spotlight: Guilty Gear X2

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When I was in high school, I had a subscription to PlayStation Magazine (aka PSM). So in between waiting for the yearly swimsuit issues, I would often find a few diamonds in the rough on the PS2 large in part to this magazine.

The biggest one of all was Guilty Gear X2, a 2D fighting game that features some of the wackiest characters and arguably the best fighting game soundtrack ever.

When I saw the 8.5/10 review of the game, I was certainly intrigued by the game. While not a mega-fighting game fan, I dabbled here and there and enjoyed most of my experiences playing them, Super Street Fighter 2 and Ultimate Mortal Kombat 3 were the two big ones for me at the time. So when I saw the badass art design of the game in the magazine, I had to see what it was all about. PSM also rarely gave out scores that high to games that weren’t AAA mega-titles so something was up.

And oh wow was something up!

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I knew right away that this was going to be a memorable game. I popped in the disc and that first five seconds of acoustic guitar in the intro song “Feedback” set me up for what would be an epic heavy metal journey into this fighting game. Followed by the “D.O.A.” menu music, it only confirmed that this was going to be an awesome experience. So I loaded up the versus mode and fawned over the diverse cast of characters. A white-haired guy fighting with a pool cue? A big-breasted witch with a guitar? A TINY PIRATE GIRL WITH AN ANCHOR?! And May it was for my first battle.

This game was so different from any fighting game I had played up until that point. The anime-like art style just stuck with me almost immediately and the animations were just so fluent. Given the absurdity that was going on during any fight, it had no business being that fluent, you would anticipate some lag or slowdown during such a crazy set of animations littering the screen, but no she ran like a dream the whole time.

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The cast of characters were so visually unique, as well as their weapons and fighting styles. The only two characters that feel similar are Sol Badguy and Ky Kiske, who pretty much serve as the Ryu/Ken equivalents of the series. You have your slow power hitters, you have your quick combo fighters, you have your ranged bullshit characters and then you have Faust and Zappa if you want to play such a confusing character that even you don’t know what’s going on and you’re the one controlling it!

Of course, like I mentioned earlier, the game shines with its heavy metal soundtrack, doing away with the usual fighting game fodder and going in a much more badass direction. No more salsa music, electronica, none of that stereotypical garbage with characters in attempt to match it up to them, all the music was just built to be badass and even then a lot of the heavy metal music written for the game matches the characters they’re attached to, songs like “Simple Life” for Bridget, “Blue Water, Blue Sky” for May and “Holy Orders (Be Just or Be Dead)” for Ky Kiske, they all fit them superbly. It’s so good they actually put out a couple albums of either live performances or re-recordings from A.S.H., the name of the group that plays this music.

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The one weak point of the game, which isn’t that much of a weak point is its Story Mode, which is part visual novel and only in Japanese voicing, which is disappointing given how good Guilty Gear Xrd’s version was in English and it had zero fighting in it! But regardless, the multiple branching paths and endings made each character’s separate story interesting enough to replay and try to get every ending, though some of the clearing conditions were a little ridiculous.

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Guilty Gear X2 is definitely still to this day my favourite fighting game of all-time. The closest anyone’s come is Persona 4 Arena, which coincidentally is an Arc System Works game, the same company who does the Guilty Gear games. But if you’re looking for an absurd heavy metal fighting game with an anime art style and fantastic animations and mechanics, Guilty Gear is definitely right up your alley and this PS2 addition to the franchise is their best effort in the entire series.

Character Spotlight: Ramlethal Valentine

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Never has a girl with such little personality (not that it’s her fault) been so goddamn beautiful. Ramlethal Valentine is a recent addition to the long-standing Guilty Gear fighting game franchise, appearing in the most recently release, Guilty Gear Xrd -SIGN-.

Generally speaking when a girl emerges with zero personality, it’s a moniker we give the character because he/she is devoid of any likeable qualities, but may or not may be at least a little bit attractive (see Lightning from FFXIII). Ramlethal however is a different case where her lack of personality actually works in her favour and makes her a far more interesting character. And well…she’s attractive as fuck!

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She already comes in with an unfair advantage. One of the sexiest things in anime for me are darker-skinned girls with light hair. It’s something that you know doesn’t work well at all in real life a lot of the time, but in anime it works just about every time and Ramlethal is no exception. She’s also at a perfect point where she’s built to be very strong and athletic, but not so far in that direction that she becomes too far on the muscle side. In fact, one would argue she’s directed more to the thin and pretty side, yet she still retains the look of a girl who’s in perfect shape for a battle. Now granted, she has an extra advantage by wearing little clothing if you don’t count her cloak as without it she’s basically wearing shorts and a strap around her chest that covers up her breasts. So she’s got some sex appeal for sure.

What really makes her go over the top for me is oddly enough her lack of personality, which in itself adds to a personality that makes her so interesting to me. While I’m not an expert on Guilty Gear lore, Ramlethal is essentially a creation of the Backyard, another dimension in the Guilty Gear universe. She’s created with the intent to have no personality, to just take orders and do them without question. However we see through one of her “sisters” Elphelt, the Valentines are not always forever devoid of all personality. As the game’s story mode progresses, we see a little bit of Ramlethal come out. But aside from her smile at the end, there are things she does that the Valentines generally aren’t supposed to do. Instead of being 100% honest since they have no emotions to give them the thought of lying, she’ll actually play dumb to hide information and try to bluff her way out of things. So as we see towards the end, she’s not as robotic as her voice first makes us assume.

Ramlethal with Sin and the magehound who bites her. Classic scene.
Ramlethal with Sin and the magehound who bites her. Classic scene.

And oddly enough, it’s that almost robotic voice that really makes her attractive to me. Erin Fitzgerald (who also does Persona 4’s Chie, so hell yeah!) does a fantastic job with taking the presumably personality-less Ramlethal and giving her a voice that manages to uphold that perception, yet break it at the same time. It’s a voice that sounds threatening, yet cute, uncaring, yet serene. It’s quite the accomplishment.

Like I’ve also said before, that essence of danger also makes her more interesting. A lot of villains get extra special attention from daydreaming guys and girls because of the idea of getting them alone and seeing that softer, sexier side of them that you know (because you tell yourself that, not because it’s fact) they have and supress. Ramlethal for me is no exception, I’m well aware that the odds are if I get too close to her she’ll slice me in half, but the idea of getting close to her and seeing the side of her she only lets out when she’s comfortable (or in this case fully develops that side) is a huge part of the fantasy with a character like her.

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Ramlethal Valentine. You don’t want to fuck with her. I suppose I’ll start from the bottom and work my way up from there then. She seems like she could use a good, long…hug. What? What did you think I was gonna say?

Top 10 Fighting Games

I love fighting games. I’m shit at them, but I love ’em! So this week’s top 10 is going to be all about fighters!

Now the rules are very simple. Since I’d have several Guilty Gear games on this list, it’ll be one game per franchise. That is all, so let’s get crackin’!

10

When you take the solid battle system of the recent Mortal Kombat reboot and apply it to the DC universe, you’ve already got a lot of people paying very close attention to what you’ve got. But a phenomenally good story mode, a vast list of playable characters are also contained in this game?! Yeah, you’ve got a solid effort there. And it’s probably the closest you’ll ever get to a good superhero fighting game to rival the Marvel vs Capcom series.

09

You can tell I haven’t played a lot of King of Fighters games when Maximum Impact is not far off the list of KoF games I would’ve picked. But ’98 is a solid game, for as much as I remember of it. I can tell you right away who I fought with all the time, either Iori, Ryo, or Mai (of course). The King of Fighters series is probably one I should take a look at again, I remember watching the newest one being played at Evo at it looked fantastic, so I’ve definitely gotta get into that.

08

I tried to find a decent picture of the logo, but this is the best I could come up with, shocking isn’t it? Aside from that, I really enjoyed Dead or Alive 2, long before I was really aware of the over-sexualization of the girls (not that I wasn’t looking then). I don’t think I ever played the original version, but rather the version that came in Dead or Alive Ultimate on the original Xbox. While people love to slut shame the Dead or Alive series, you can’t deny just how solid the gameplay is. But I will admit, I totally played schoolgirl Ayane, whipping everyone’s asses.

07

As awesome as this game still is, fuck this game! I’m so bad at this game that to this very day I still haven’t beaten Shao Kahn, 100% truth. Holy fuck this game kicks my ass and I know it’s not that hard! Anyways, tremendous roster, probably the best roster the series ever had (if you don’t count Mortal Kombat Trilogy or Armageddon) and one of the most memorable old-school fighting games out there. But still…fuck you Shao Kahn!

06

You know a game must be really good when it’s had two more iterations since, both super good, but when it comes to major eSports tournaments related to the Super Smash Bros franchise, they still pick Melee above the others. And for good reason, this game is easily the best SSB game there is. It pains me to admit that, cause there’s so many characters I wouldn’t be able to play, but it’s that good. Another game I wasn’t super good at (cause I’m a game behind before I can be a dick with Sonic), but no matter how badly I’d get my ass kicked, it was fun playing with friends. And it still is.

05

I want to put this game so much higher cause that’s how much I love the Persona series right now. But alas the #5 spot is the spot for this game. A bigger roster than the previous game, adding in the remaining Persona 3 characters that didn’t appear the first time, though the addition of Rise as a fighter was not very welcome from me, she never fought once before this game. But anything made by Arc System Works is fucking fantastic and when you mix that with my favourite series right now, you’ve got a match made in heaven. It looks great, plays great and the story mode is super good, if you can handle visual novels of course.

04

Okay, okay, okay, okay! I know what you’re thinking. Adam! Why the fuck didn’t you pick Soul Calibur II?! FUCKING LINK, MAN!!! And I get it, I understand. But the third game introduced Tira and I’m sorry, but no fairy boy is going to trump the crazy blue-haired ring blade toting crazy bitch who I am totally not be biased about whatsoever. But I do honestly feel like this game improved upon the already solid Soul Calibur II and made it even better. I love this game Tira!

03

A legendary game with a legendary roster. You may never in video games find a more varied, all over the place level of roster with some of the best names in the Marvel universe and some of the best names in all of Capcom’s library. And you take this crazy large roster, give them all very balanced and cool movesets and the gameplay is super solid?! Sweet mother of mystery, give us a chance to collect our jaws up off the floor! This is one of those games that will life on in infamy for a long time, given what it represents in the fighting game chronicles of history. Because being able to kick Hulk’s ass with B.B. Hood is hilarious.

02

The sheer number of times I played this game as a kid on my Super Nintendo, holy shit. It’s also the first fighting game I actually managed to beat the final boss in and that’s a big deal to me. You wanna talk about legendary games from the past, this is THE legendary old-school fighting game. Kicked a lot of ass with Cammy (while she showed hers off) and thought nothing of T.Hawk’s stereotypical character. Also slapped the shit out of people as E.Honda. Fuck yeah!

01

I will fully admit there is clear bias with this game. It’s not the best fighting game by any means, but it’s easily my favourite. It’s got my favourite art style, my favourite soundtrack and for fuck’s sake you can play as a tiny Japanese girl who fights with an anchor and summons dolphins out of nowhere and fight a large-breasted woman who fights with a guitar, all this while heavy metal is blasting in the background. That’s something you can do in Guilty Gear, you tell me what about that isn’t awesome?! That’s right, you can’t think of a good reason! So that’s why Guilty Gear is my #1 fighting game of all-time.

Heaven or hell…LET’S ROCK!!!

Top 10 Female Video Game Characters I’d Sleep With

***If you have a problem with lists like these, they’re not real women. Spare me the sexism and over-sexualization speeches. Read this article I wrote too.***

To clarify on this list, the 10 female characters you will see on this list are NOT characters that I’d fall in love with, hang out with, have a relationship with, anything of the sort. This is the 10 girls in video games that I’d totally without regret have a rockin’ one-night stand with, nothing more. A Top 10 list of the characters I’d marry? Now that’s a list for another day!

Now I shouldn’t have to explain myself here, but just in case those reading this list feel like blowing a gasket at this list, here’s a heads up. Remember that this is my own personal list, so the girls who made this list are based on my own preferences for what I’m attracted to. Also a lot of the choices on this list are not strictly just for looks, some of them have some logical reasons behind them as well. For example, she may be a girl I would love nothing more than to have around every day, but because of certain reasons, maybe a one-time-only would be best for my own safety. So just keep this in mind, my list will easily be different than pretty much everyone else’s.

So let’s get right to it!

10

I’m starting off with an extremely random and very uncommon character. As far as I know, not a lot of people ended up playing RAGE. It’s not a great game by any means, I pretty much forget everything about this game, that is except for Loosum. She shows up early on in the game to teach you how to master the Wingsticks and the moment I laid my eyes on her, she was just absolutely perfect. At the time in 2011 when this game came out, it was showing off id Software’s new Tech 5 engine, so it was top of the line graphics being pumped out, so Loosum had a distinct advantage going in. Character-wise, there’s not a whole lot to say, since she’s around for all of five minutes of importance. She has some spunk to her and she certainly knows how to show herself off, she knows she’s gorgeous. Personally, I’d consider keeping her around, but the first name just breaks it for me. “So what’s your wife’s name?” “*sigh* Loosum…” Yeah…that ain’t gonna fly.

09

As a heads up, Cammy is pretty much the only character on this list that would be considered by the video gaming community as a sex symbol. Generally speaking, the video game vixens that are on the top of everyone’s list just don’t fit any other criteria from me other than having a great body. But Cammy is so damn smoking hot, that she manages to make the list anyways. Although she holds a special place in my heart because she pretty much is the first video game character I saw on screen that fit the bill of being that sexy girl in a video game. I played Super Street Fighter II for the SNES a ton as a kid and Cammy was my main character, admittedly her ass was half the reason I picked her all the time, I was actually pretty good with her too, so it just happened to work out perfectly. If there’s any video game girl that’s on the top of everyone else’s lists that I’d have to pick over all the others, she’s without a doubt the one for me to go with.

08

Another anomaly on this list, I would think. Very few people play the Guilty Gear games and that’s a damn shame. So this lovely tanned, light-haired expressionless evil non-human girl from the Backyard will likely be even less-known as she’s from the newest game, Guilty Gear Xrd. She falls into the category of girls in games that I’d love to spend the night with, but the likelyhood of dying trying to get to that point makes it pretty difficult. But from playing the story mode of GGXrd, I really fell in love with her character, her expressionless voice and demeanor makes her extremely adorable to me to the point I want to try and snap her out of it, she seems like the girl that would be just a giant cutie once she opens up. And to top it all off, I have a giant soft spot for anime-drawn tanned or darker skinned girls. I don’t know why, especially since it doesn’t translate into real life at all.

07

Malon’s simply a victim of living in a world I would just refuse to live in and I know I wouldn’t be able to pry her out of it. She’s probably the overall prettiest girl on this list and certainly the most homely. But if I were to consider her for my future Top 10 Video Game Girls I’d Marry list, I’d have to commit to living the farm life and there’s no goddamn way you’d catch me working my ass off on a farm, I wouldn’t survive. And judging her character, like I said there’s no way you’re prying this lovely redhead away from that life either. What a damn shame…

06

Lightning is the prime example of a girl you would never catch me dead spending any more time than I’d have to with her. She’s absolutely insufferable, a constant pain in the ass, I can’t listen to her speak for more than a few words before I want to punch her in the face. But goddamn did Square Enix draw her superbly. Of course only the idiots at Square Enix would create one of the most hateable female characters I’ve ever known, yet also make her arguably the hottest Final Fantasy girl of all (yes, that includes rivaling Tifa). I just hope that if I was to ever share a bed with her, I wouldn’t have to listen to hours of her brooding about her sister.

05

Persona 4 is pretty much my favourite game of all-time. There isn’t a single character in the series that I have a major problem with and when it comes to the many female characters in the game, the majority of them are in consideration for the Top 10 Marry list. But Rise is the odd one out. It’s funny, she’s clearly presented as the hottest girl in the game and she is without any doubt. However when it comes to her character, she just doesn’t grab my attention nearly enough compared to all the others to follow through on anything other than a single night. It could be the fact she’s overly flirty, the fact she’s an idol and would be constantly targeted by other guys, or just the fact she (depending on when I’d catch her) struggles to figure out who she really is, where the line between her normal self or the idol persona. Either way, I’d love to hang out with her, but certainly not in a dating manner.

04

We started the crazy and evil with Ramlethal at #8, now we resume that trend with likely the most dangerous lady on this list. I’m noting that I’d prefer the Mass Effect 3 version of Jack because I like her far more with hair and her new outfit. Jack was a tough one to place, there’s so many factors behind her being on this list. I love girls with tattoos, tomboys and some of the sexiest characters to me are the ones you know there’s no chance in hell you’d ever get with for any reason, but your physical well-being adds onto that with Jack. As we’ve seen in the Mass Effect series, she views sex as almost a common thing due to her screwed up life before meeting Shepard. But as quickly as she’ll bed you, she’s likely to tear you apart, literally. So for my own safety, as quick as she’d want to fuck, I’d just as quickly fuck off before I’d lose my life.

03

Now unlike Jack, she may not kill me, but the hundreds if not thousands of experiments she’d run on me if I ever happened to get close to her would be almost just as bad. But damn, talk about a 10/10, without a doubt the hottest Fire Emblem character. She also has a distinct advantage because anyone I’ve ever seen cosplay her has been just as gorgeous, she translates perfectly into real life as well. I’ve run through Awakening twice, the first time I made the boneheaded decision to have my character marry Lissa and immediately regretted it after getting to know Tharja a lot more. She gives off that forbidden fruit aura, the one girl you can’t resist, but you know that it would be in your best interests to not pursue her. But with that body, I wouldn’t blame anyone, male or female from going after her regardless.

02

The pinnacle of crazy, the girl that I know that I’d never be able to get close to. Jack would let you have a round and then you’re screwed. Tharja might let you in, but you’d be so messed up from all the experiments first, it might not even matter. But Tira, I don’t think there’s a chance in hell you’d be able to even touch her before she’d slice you apart with that ring blade. The first time I laid eyes on her in Soul Calibur III, that was it, I loved her. I was a huge Talim fan the previous game and I thought no one could top her, she was super pretty. But Tira just shot in with that amazing badass hair, the makeup, those piercing violet eyes and of course that phenomenal body. The artwork of her in the picture above is one of the best I’ve seen from any game, let alone fighting games. But behind that body is one of the most twisted, sadistic minds, one who would cut your throat within seconds of meeting you. Come to think of it, it would give her line “Awww you broke already? Oh well, I guess I’m done with you.” a new meaning. *shudders*

And finally, my #1 pick:

01

There’s a ton of reasons why Yuna’s at the top of this list. I’m sure most are surprised she’s not being considered on the Top 10 Marry list, most feel she’s very homely, a wonderful girl, beautiful as hell and all those are true. But there’s a bunch that put her on this side rather than the other. I wasn’t a huge fan of her FFX character, she was too softspoken and the whole super-religious thing immediately turned this atheist off, especially nowadays where it’s in full-swing. But the biggest problem with Yuna has nothing to do with her personally, it’s just a matter of being the odd one out. Logically if I lived in Spira, she simply wouldn’t be on my mind because of one thing:

This girl.

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So because of Rikku, Yuna ends up being at the top of the list, just because I would absolutely love to spend the rest of my life with her if she existed, but there’s already a girl in the same universe I’d pick over her. Sorry, Yunie!

I hope you all enjoyed this list, it was fun to make. Remember it’s not serious at all, it’s all in good fun. Your list will be way different than mine for various reasons. And most of all, if you think this is creepy to post, for god’s sake they’re not real, it doesn’t matter.

And realistically, don’t tell me you don’t fantasize about sleeping with someone. I just happen to have zero problems saying it out loud.