Tag Archives: nintendo

Only Sony Themselves Can Drive Me Away From Sticking With PlayStation

I’ve said it before, the console war is dumb as fuck. I could care less about brand loyalty and especially about senseless cult-like followings that will defend every decision their company of choice makes, regardless of how anti-gamer it is.

Me? I take a much different approach. When the current generation first started and the Xbox One and PlayStation 4 were about to release, I was a Xbox 360 guy. Had been since the very beginning. All my friends had it, so it was an easy decision.

But there was always a sticking point with me as a guy who used to play his PlayStation 2 endlessly. A lot of the exclusives to that brand were games I grew up with, like Persona, Kingdom Hearts, even Final Fantasy (because at the time FFXIII didn’t count to me, cause I hated it so much), so there were a lot of games I felt I could’ve been missing out on. I’m big on the Japanese market and those games were all on PlayStation. Thankfully, I didn’t miss out on too much during the PS3 era. But I knew Persona 5 and Kingdom Hearts 3 were potential possibilities for the PS4, so I had to keep that in mind when choosing my next console. Also by the time I came to making my decision, my friends list on Xbox 360 had dwindled, people vanishing, drama between certain groups of friends, so my need to keep on the same console was lessened deeply.

Then Microsoft made it really easy for me. They decided it’d be a great idea to release a console that had to be online at all times, wouldn’t allow you to play used games and basically be a TV box that also played video games. That reveal event and following E3 left an unbelievable sour taste in my mouth and there was no going back. I was going to buy a PS4. Not solely out of spite, but some spite in there along with the long list of reasons I had already.

This upcoming generation is a little different. My thoughts on PlayStation having the market of games exclusive to them remains the same. My friends list, while smaller as most of them were Destiny friends and I’ve pretty much decided to step away from that game, I still have a core group of friends I talk to almost daily in parties on that console. So right now, the ball is really in Sony’s court. Which brings me to the title of this post.

100%, the only way I will not buy a PlayStation 5 is if Sony repeats similar mistakes to either how they released the PlayStation 3, or how Microsoft absolutely fucked themselves over with the Xbox One reveal. As long as Sony doesn’t release a massively overpriced console and doesn’t put in a bunch of features that come off as anti-gamer, I’m good.

Looking back now, the no-disc thing doesn’t necessarily bother me as much, as a lot of games I buy are digital. But most of them I also buy much later into their life cycle when they’re on sale at massive discounts. The one fear about an all-digital console is whether or not they’d be inclined to have as many sales with the discounts they have. If there’s no competition through retail chains to sell copies, will we as consumers still get good deals? That’s a question that really could make a difference.

Realistically, what could Sony do to piss me off and make me switch consoles. They’d have to pull a similar stunt to Microsoft with the Xbox One. Now I’ve read stories about how Sony wants to integrate their music and video service with PlayStation and honestly, that’s perfectly fine, if it’s not shoved down our throats and marketed like it’s the main feature of the console. We as gamers don’t care if the console has all these music and video apps, we want a new console that’s native 4K and 60fps. That is the most important thing, make a powerful console and put games we like on it. Everything else comes secondary.

So who knows how it’ll go in this upcoming generation. Assuming it’s either in the Fall of this year or 2020, I’ll soon be at another crossroads, not to mention the Switch is still a viable option, so long as they keep the library of good games coming. At this point though, the ball’s in Sony’s court, they’re really the only ones who can stray me away from buying their own console.

Will I be in line to buy a PS5 at launch? God no. I may not even have a PS5 until at least two years after in launches. After all, it’s not like the PS4 won’t still have most of the major games out for it and generally speaking, the first year or so of a new console is usually pretty ‘meh’ at best, given that developers are in the midst of testing how far they can go with the new hardware. So suffice to say, I’ll certainly have time before the console reveals and after said reveals.

Unless Cyberpunk 2020 is a launch game with the new generation and only the new generation. Then I’m fucked.

What The N64 Classic Should Look Like

So hype continues to ramp up about the SNES Classic and the NES Classic will indeed be making a comeback, regardless of the fact it never should’ve gone out of production to begin with.

But it got me thinking, now that the SNES Classic is coming, obviously the next console in line for a classic version would be the Nintendo 64. So let’s say the default number is 30 games. What would go in this bundle of nostalgia? Well, let’s take a trip back and time and figure out what games will go into this future piece of wonderful childhood memories.

NOTE: There is one notable game missing, that being “Conker’s Bad Fur Day”. Because let’s be honest, Nintendo is not putting that game in there, due to its “offensive” content.

The Nintendo Essentials – #1-15

Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time

The most obvious choice, the game many consider to be the greatest game of all-time, let alone the best game on the Nintendo 64. A legendary adventure, some of the greatest bosses and dungeons we’ve ever seen in the Zelda franchise, fantastic music, a solid story…

…and the Water Temple.

Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask

You obviously can’t have one Zelda without the other. While Majora’s Mask isn’t nearly as high in the minds of gamers as Ocarina of Time, there’s no doubt that this game did some unbelievably unique things for that time and introduced a lot of kids to a much more dark kind of story, a game that definitely had a lot of us learn a few important life lessons and grew from it.

Also it kicked my ass. A lot.

Super Mario 64

Another gem, another classic, the amazing transition from the hallmark of Nintendo’s lineup into the three-dimensional world of graphics. Like Ocarina of Time, this game is considered one of the greatest of all-time, classic music, great bosses, solid gameplay and one of my favourite games to watch speedruns of.

I can barely muster 50 stars period, let alone doing it in an hour.

Super Smash Bros.

The game that started it all, the games that finally answered questions of who would win in a fight. Super Smash Bros took this theme and ran away with it and no one has ever been able to come close to replicating the thrill of these kinds of games.

Because no other game has a meme the level of Falcon Punch.

Mario Kart 64

While Super Mario Kart was the original, Mario Kart 64 was the one that started perfecting the Mario Kart formula. Still my favourite Mario Kart game to date, the track selection was so good back then and it’s one of those games that even though it looks terrible now, it still hasn’t aged gameplay-wise to me, it’s still perfect.

Yoshi Valley FTW!!!

Paper Mario

A lot like how Super Mario RPG made us realize that the Mario franchise was more than just a platform and could go into a more strategic direction, then Paper Mario came out on the N64 and gave us an RPG that had such unbelievable charm and mechanics that few RPGs could ever come close to replicating. A series that really isn’t talked about enough.

To be fair, there are like a thousand different Mario games nowadays…

Donkey Kong 64

It’s no Donkey Kong Country, but the three-dimensional transition was relatively smooth for the Donkey Kong franchise. Not my favourite game on the system, but you cannot deny the value of this game within the lineup on this console.

It’s a great game, but I strongly disagree with the 90 it has on Metacritic. It’s good and belongs on this package, but it ain’t THAT good.

Diddy Kong Racing

Now here’s the best Donkey Kong-related game on the N64! Criminally under-appreciated game, was far better than it had any business being, as most franchises that had a kart racing game ended up being beyond bad. One of the best kart racing games of all-time in my opinion.

Just fuck the boss battles, holy shit I spent so much time trying to beat those.

Star Fox 64

This is actually the lone major Nintendo game I’m listing here that I’ve never played. But I recognize the value of this game, not just for the “do a barrel roll” meme, but for being what many consider to be the best in the series.

Which is easy considering any Star Fox games after it have been…less than stellar.

F-Zero X

Speaking of really good racing games, here’s one that kicked my ass six ways from Sunday every single time I played it. One of the coolest games I ever played on the console, its fast and furious nature made the game so much fun to play, regardless of how bad you were at it.

Because 99.9% of us were really REALLY bad at it.

Pokemon Stadium 2

One of these games had to make it on the list and the second is easily the better game. More Pokemon, the system and mechanics were smoothed out and the mini-games on this version just enhance it that much more.

No one’s beating me in Streaming Stampede.

Mario Party

I don’t have a personal preference on which of the games on the console belong here, so I just went with the original. Another series of games that changed what kind of games we’ll play on consoles. Who knew a board game full of mini-games would be so much fun?!

Because Monopoly is NEVER fun. Stop it. Just fucking stop it!

Kirby 64: The Crystal Shards

Out of all of Nintendo’s major franchises, Kirby’s the one I’ve struggled to get into. But Crystal Shards on the N64 was the one Kirby game that actually grabbed my attention and I finished. I loved the style and mechanics of this game and goddamn that final boss. So freaking creepy!

Because not every Kirby game can be the cutest thing ever apparently…

Mario Tennis

We’re finishing the last two spots of 15 for the two big sports games in the Mario series. Starting with Tennis, this was really the game that got me interested in non-professional sports games. The hyperactive style of the game really grabbed me and forced me to look at sports as more than just realistic representations of the sport.

Because nothing’s more fun than smacking a tennis ball at supersonic speeds.

Mario Golf

The other game was Mario Golf, which while it didn’t take crazy strides in making golf more unrealistic, it did however have an undeniable charm that kept me coming back, no matter how hard the windy desert course was.

Though I will admit, I played the fuck out of the mini-golf game within Mario Golf. So good!

The Major Classics – #16-25

Perfect Dark

The best FPS game on the Nintendo 64, I do not care about your arguments on Goldeneye, as much as I love that game. The setting was so much cooler, the weapons were so much cooler, there was an actual well-told story with great characters, hell I’d say even the multiplayer was better.

Because there was no fucking Oddjob in it!

Goldeneye 007

Speaking of Goldeneye, I’m in no way shape or form saying Goldeneye wasn’t a good game, it was a fucking great game! It was the original FPS game on consoles that really pushed people into the multiplayer direction with these types of games. It also gave you hope that film-based games wouldn’t suck, something that happens so much nowadays.

But seriously, fuck Oddjob!

Banjo-Kazooie

I don’t know how I’ve never played a game in this series, it’s one of those gaming mysteries of mine. But from people I know and have watched online, they all praise the hell out of this series. Great 3D platforming game during the era that saw Crash, Rayman and more, this was Nintendo’s solid console platformer that wasn’t Super Mario 64.

If Banjo-Tooie was better, lemme know, I just went with the original on this one.

Wave Race 64

Another solid racing game on the N64, but a water-based racing game. Goddamn was this game fun, one of the few racing games I mastered when I was little. I played it recently on an emulator however and boy oh boy I need to regain the skills I once had. Super fun racing game, not talked about nearly enough.

But to be fair, when you have Mario Kart 64 AND Diddy Kong Racing next to you, yeah you’ll be missed by a few people.

Excitebike 64

Another game I managed to miss, but man oh man everyone tells me how much fun this game was. I was never too into motorcycle racing games, they were always rough around the edges for me. But I’m told this one’s really good AND has a soccer mini-game?! Okay, I’m down for that!

Come to think of it, how has no one tried to do what Rocket League is doing right now?!

Star Wars: Rogue Squadron

Oh my god the time I lost to sucking at this game. That’s how good this game was, I was terrible at it and yet I played the fuck out of this game. As far as I’m concerned, this was the Star Wars game that really kickstarted the flood of Star Wars game throughout the market. Because flying in a X-Wing is the most badass thing ever!

No matter how many times I crashed and died on the first level…

NFL Blitz 2000

I never played football games, still don’t to this day. I will play the fuck out of NFL Blitz 2000 though! A game that truly represents why we need to stop having sports games that nowadays are lifeless representations of the sport filled with microtransactions. NFL Blitz 2000 is an arcade-football classic, making the sport far more fun than I consider it to be when watching it.

Because I just want to see car wreck level hits. Not realistic representations of what goes on between plays.

Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater 2

A time before the Tony Hawk series was terrible and now completely gone, the second game in the franchise is easily the best one, filled with the best courses, tricks, music, all that jazz. I really miss these kinds of games and it’s really sad that no one’s making them to the same level the original few games were.

I miss doing five-minute long manual grinds…

Turok: Dinosaur Hunter

Missed out on this franchise when I was younger, as Jurassic Park scared me away from anything dinosaur-related. I’ve heard nothing but good things about the original games and footage I’ve watched of it makes it really fall into my wheelhouse with it’s wacky over-the-top weapons and such.

Again, if the second game is better, lemme know, just went with the original.

Harvest Moon 64

I put way too much time into this game than I should have. It’s even crazier considering no other Harvest Moon game has captured me to the extent the N64 version did, hell even Stardew Valley which is universally praised didn’t grab me. Harvest Moon 64 is an anomaly for me, a farming game that actually took hold of me and didn’t let go, one that I still enjoy to this day.

Karen is best girl, by the way.

The Hidden Gems – #26-30

San Francisco Rush 2049

If you have never played this unbelievable racing game, go download an emulator and this game right the fuck now! I don’t know if there’s ever been a racing game this insane that worked so well. The over-the-top nature, full of high speed, massive airtime and a ton of flips and spins, it works so goddamn well and is timeless to me.

I still spend my days trying to land 100-spin jumps.

Jet Force Gemini

The de facto “most underrated game” on the Nintendo 64. A game that I would have never heard of had I not walked into my local game rental store and all the games I wanted to play were already rented that weekend and the box art of this game just looked cool to me. You are doing yourself a massive disservice by not playing this third-person shooter, which I consider a “masterpiece” on the console.

Just talking about it makes me want to go back and play it…

Mega Man 64

I don’t care what anyone says, the Mega Man Legends games are in my opinion the best games in the entire franchise. I prefer the PlayStation version of the original game, but I first played this classic on the N64. Fantastic adventure game featuring Mega Man and has easily my favourite character in the entire series, Tron Bonne.

“You should’ve known better than to pick a fight with the Bonnes!”

Destruction Derby 64

This was one of my favourite games growing up, as much like most boys at that age, you just want to see cars crash into each other and explode all the time. This game is not the greatest, I’ll admit, but goddamn was it fun to play with friends growing up.

Never before was it so fun to lose.

Mystical Ninja starring Goemon

Out of all the N64 games that I have played and nobody knows about, this is the one I want everyone to know about. It has a low rating online, but I could care less, it’s the game that introduced me to the absurdity of Japanese writing and comedy and let has some decent platforming and fucking mech battles!

But holy crap did this game make my head explode with all the wacky and strange Japanese comedy.


So that’s it, that’s my 30 games for a Nintendo 64 Classic. Let me know what you think about my selections in the comments below and add your favourites that you’d want to see!

E3 2017 Press Conferences – My Thoughts

I didn’t get a chance to watch all the press conferences live, but I’ve seen all the trailers and gameplay footage that was shown. So while again this won’t be a massive paragraph-laden article, I will give my thoughts on each game shown at the various conferences this year with a simple response to each of them.

Here’s how I’ll rate every game. They’ll be in one of four categories:

  1. PRE-ORDERING IT RIGHT NOW!!! – I think that’s pretty self-explanatory, it’s a game I for sure will be playing.
  2. GO ON… – My attention is definitely piqued, it’s a game that will likely be one I pick up a little later in its life cycle once it goes down in price a little bit and it’s generally garnering a positive reaction.
  3. MEH! – While there may be some promise or potential there, the core concepts, the gameplay, story, visuals, etc., they’re just not grabbing me. It’s possible I’ll end up playing the game, but will likely fall wayside to to many others that are above it on the list.
  4. NOPE!!! – Whether it’s a game not suited for my style, or just a bad-looking game, it’s one I don’t plan on playing, unless it reaches Game of the Year appeal and that may not even be enough to pique my interest.

So in order, we’ll start with EA’s conference and work our way to Nintendo’s earlier today:

  • Anthem – MEH! (Due to showing nothing, see Microsoft for a proper rating)
  • A Way Out – GO ON…
  • Battlefield 1: The Name of the Czar – NOPE!!!
  • FIFA 18 – MEH!
  • Madden 18 – NOPE!!!
  • NBA Live 18 – NOPE!!!
  • Need For Speed: Payback – NOPE!!!
  • Star Wars Battlefront II – MEH!

I saw EA’s press conference live and it was an absolutely horrendous one. Putting aside the sports games for those who don’t care for that (I do, but they never show the NHL games), the conference was still really bad. Need For Speed looks horrible, Battlefront II was boring to watch and I’m not convinced Anthem and A Way Out are on the good path just yet.

EA’S OVERALL SCORE: 1.5/5

  • Anthem – GO ON…
  • Ashen – MEH!
  • Assassin’s Creed: Origins – MEH!
  • Black Desert Online – MEH!
  • Code Vein – NOPE!!!
  • Crackdown 3 – MEH!
  • Cuphead – PRE-ORDERING RIGHT NOW!!! (On PC)
  • Dragon Ball Fighter Z – PRE-ORDERING RIGHT NOW!!! (On PS4)
  • Forza Motorsport 7 – MEH!
  • Deep Rock Galactic – MEH!
  • Life Is Strange: Before The Storm – PRE-ORDERING RIGHT NOW!!! (On PC/PS4)
  • Metro: Exodus – NOPE!!! (Don’t play horror games)
  • PlayerUnknown’s Battlegrounds – N/A (Already on PC)
  • Ori And The Will Of The Wisps – MEH! (Looks gorgeous though)
  • Sea of Thieves – GO ON…
  • Shadow of War – MEH!
  • State of Decay 2 – PRE-ORDERING RIGHT NOW!!! (On PC)
  • Super’s Lucky Tale – MEH! (Looks great for kids though)
  • Tacoma – PRE-ORDERING RIGHT NOW!!! (On PC)
  • The Artful Escape – MEH!
  • The Darwin Project – MEH!
  • The Last Night – PRE-ORDERING RIGHT NOW!!! (I don’t care what the lead developer said in 2014, just shut up already…)
  • Xbox One X – MEH!

There’s a lot of games here, hell I didn’t even count all the ID @ Xbox games shown, because you see so little of them. Microsoft is certainly trying to get some players back after Sony lured them away (by trying), but I think the damage has been done, mostly self-inflicted by Microsoft themselves. After all, how do you sell a console that PC players would accept when they can play the very games you’re advertising on this console, on the PC they already own?

MICROSOFT’S OVERALL SCORE: 3/5

  • Dishonored – Death of the Outsider – MEH!
  • DOOM VR – MEH! (Don’t care for VR right now)
  • Fallout 4 VR – MEH! (Don’t care for VR right now)
  • Quake Champions – MEH!
  • Skyrim (Switch) – MEH!
  • The Elder Scrolls Legends – MEH!
  • The Evil Within 2 – NOPE!!! (Don’t play horror games)
  • Wolfenstein II: The New Colossus – GO ON…

Unless you were into VR, this conference was a whole lot of nothing, in my opinion. Other than Wolfenstein’s new game, everything else was either okay at best or not interesting at all. It’s clear that Bethesda may need to take a break from conferences, they’re just smacking the bottom of the proverbial ketchup bottle at this point.

BETHESDA’S OVERALL SCORE: 2/5

  • Beyond Good & Evil 2 – *faints* PRE-ORDERING RIGHT NOW!!! (Almost 15 years in the making, this was the moment this year at E3)
  • Far Cry 5 – PRE-ORDERING RIGHT NOW!!!
  • Mario + Rabbids: Kingdom Battle – PRE-ORDERING RIGHT NOW!!! (If I had a Switch)
  • Skull & Bones – GO ON…
  • South Park: Phone Destroyer – GO ON… (We’ll see how expensive it’ll cost ya in microtransactions)
  • South Park: The Fractured But Whole – PRE-ORDERING RIGHT NOW!!!
  • Starlink: Battle of Atlas – NOPE!!! (For the sake of all our wallets)
  • Steep Olympics DLC – MEH!
  • The Crew 2 – NOPE!!!
  • Transference – GO ON… (Might just be horror, but it’s an interesting concept. Too bad it’s VR-based though)

There were some amazing moments in Beyond Good & Evil 2 and the shockingly good-looking Mario/Rabbids game, but there were also some unbelievably bad games like The Crew 2 as well. The conference was a mixed bag, but mostly good in the end.

UBISOFT’S OVERALL SCORE: 3/5

  • Call of Duty: WWII – GO ON… (First time in a long time I’ve been really interested in a Call of Duty game)
  • Days Gone – MEH!
  • Destiny 2 – PRE-ORDERED ALREADY!!!
  • Detroit: Become Human – GO ON…
  • God of War – GO ON…
  • Horizon: Zero Dawn: The Frozen Wilds – GO ON… (I’ve still yet to get the actual game)
  • Marvel vs Capcom Infinite – MEH!
  • Monster Hunter World – GO ON… (A massive get for Sony though!)
  • PS VR Games (Skyrim, FFXV Fishing, The Inpatient, Bravo Team) – MEH!
  • Shadow of the Colossus Remake – GO ON…
  • Spider-Man – MEH! (I’m not convinced yet, looks like every other Spider-Man game)
  • Uncharted: Lost Legacy – MEH!
  • Undertale – N/A (Already own it. PLAY IT!!!)

Sony just showed us a bunch of trailers, most of them without gameplay, so there wasn’t a whole lot to sink my teeth into. And overall, the games I wanted to see gameplay from never got it, so there was never really anything to excite me aside from Monster Hunter returning to the PlayStation and of course (because I’m a fanboy) some more Destiny 2 stuff.

SONY’S OVERALL SCORE: 2.5/5

  • Kirby – MEH!
  • Metroid Prime 4 – GO ON…
  • Metroid: Samus Returns – GO ON…
  • “Pokemon RPG” – GO ON… (The Nintendo consoles have needed one for quite some time)
  • Rocket League – N/A (Have it on PS4, great get for Switch)
  • Super Mario Odyssey – GO ON…
  • The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild DLC – GO ON…
  • Xenoblade Chronicles 2 – GO ON… 
  • Yoshi – MEH!

The immediate problem with the Nintendo Direct showcases, while I gave no real “bad” ratings, all these games were generally games we all thought would be coming, including Metroid Prime 4. They had to finally make it guys. Even the Pokemon RPG game, the consoles have desperately needed a good Pokemon game for quite some time, the handhelds couldn’t have all the spotlight. So the Nintendo Direct this year wasn’t bad per se, there just wasn’t anything of note.

NINTENDO’S OVERALL SCORE: 2.5/5


So who won this year’s battle of the conferences? By ratings, we’re narrowing it down to our two 3/5 rated shows, Microsoft and Ubisoft.

And the winner is…UBISOFT!!!

The official order at this year’s E3:

  1. Ubisoft
  2. Microsoft
  3. Nintendo
  4. Sony
  5. Bethesda
  6. EA

Strictly for the moment that was Michel Ancel getting very emotional about Beyond Good & Evil 2 finally being a thing he could be proud to show off, Ubisoft owns this year basically because they had the lone moment. I was 100% correct about my suspicions that this year’s E3 was not going to be overly eventful. There’s a lot of good games coming in the next year for sure, but I think it may also end up being one of the weaker years. After all, we’re running out of major surprises and legendary series that are consistently good, so in the next three years, all the major developers and publishers need to look at creating new IPs to really bring things back to how they were in the 3-5 years before this E3.

So, what did you guys think about this year’s E3 overall? What really excited you? What disappointed you? Share in the comments below!

I Expect E3 2017 To Be Extremely Underwhelming

I really do try my best to not be pessimistic and cynical as much as I tend to be, but sometimes there are moments where you cannot help yourself and you have to feel this way. For me, this year’s E3 is that very example.

I don’t feel like there’s much to look forward to at this year’s E3. Personally, I think so much of what we’re going to see is going to be a lineup of things we’ve already known about for years now. I’m fully expecting to see at the very least a 70%+ lineup from Microsoft and Sony that will large in part be the same as what they showed off last year, the difference being for a bunch of these games, they’ll actually have release dates and the like.

For example, here’s what I’m positive we’ll see from Microsoft and Sony:

Microsoft

  • Project Scorpio (a third of their presentation will be about it)
  • Obligatory HALO something (game, film/tv series, there’s always something)
  • Red Dead Redemption 2
  • Crackdown 3 (which keeps not coming out)
  • Sea of Thieves (same deal)
  • State of Decay 2
  • Obligatory ID @ Xbox (because Microsoft cares about indies…)

Sony

  • The Last of Us 2
  • Uncharted: The Lost Legacy
  • God of War (aka God of War IV, but who cares about numbers anymore, right?)
  • Destiny 2
  • Days Gone (because we always need more zombies)
  • Death Stranding (and we’ll still know nothing about it)
  • Detroit: Become Human
  • Knack 2
  • Spider-Man (maybe)

Nintendo is the real wildcard here. Why? Well because we don’t really know what Nintendo has, because upon the Switch’s arrival, we had almost zero games for it aside from indie games and ports. But here’s the few games we’re sure to see from them:

Nintendo

  • Super Mario Odyssey
  • Splatoon 2
  • ARMS
  • Something Pokemon-related
  • More mobile games

Personally, I’m not holding out much hope for something crazy to come out and surprise me. I’m going into this E3 thinking this year is more about setting down foundations now, rather than trying to wow the fans away from their competition. Nintendo might go the surprise route, but that’s more because they have so much more room to throw in new things we haven’t heard about yet. Sony and Microsoft on the other hand, their shows are already pretty full assuming all their unfinished projects aren’t cancelled and being swept under the rug.

There’s a lot I’d like to see this year in terms of surprises and such, but here’s all the things I don’t think we will see that could be considered as much:

  • Beyond Good & Evil 2 (it’s never happening, guys)
  • Grand Theft Auto VI (Rockstar is going to be sucking on this tit for a long time before they start thinking about a new one)
  • Kingdom Hearts III/Final Fantasy VII Remake release date
  • Square Enix’s Avengers IP (I think they’ll talk about it, but not actually show anything gameplay-wise)
  • Metroid Prime 4 (I think if it’s coming, we’re still a year away from that announcement)
  • Cyberpunk 2077 (I think we’re also a year from this one starting to make the rounds)

I could go on and on about even less likely things, like y’know…a new Chrono game, a new Mother (Earthbound) game, things of that nature, but those pipe dreams will always be just that, a pipe dream. I’ve come to terms with a lot of these dreams never coming to fruition, in the way that I imagine a lot of Half-Life fans are finally accepting that Half-Life 3 may never arrive. So because of that acceptance, I truly do believe that this year’s E3 will not have as many surprises as we’ve come to expect in recent years.

Now could I be wrong? Of course I could, but my brain is telling me right now that there’s too much already on the list for all the three console makers to really shock us with something. Could EA, Bethesda, Square Enix, Activision, or any of those developers sneak something through at their own conferences? Sure, but my focus is on the three that truly matter, that being Sony, Microsoft and Nintendo. I think with a large lineup already, Sony doesn’t have much room for surprises, I think with Project Scorpio, Microsoft will be pushing it way too much to have room for surprises. Nintendo is the tricky one because there’s so much open, but is there anything truly surprising that Nintendo could come out with? I can’t really think of anything, is a new Metroid, Donkey Kong, Super Smash Bros., any game like that, is it all that surprising when it’s Nintendo’s bread and butter?

There will always be a big surprise at E3, but I just don’t feel like there will be nearly as many stories this year as we’ve had in others. This year will likely be more about a flurry of games coming out in the fall and Nintendo/Microsoft continuing to try and catch up to the hot start Sony had with the PlayStation 4 at the beginning of its cycle.

It’s always exciting when E3 rolls around. This year though, I’m going in with low expectations this time around.

Huh…Nintendo Actually Listened…

I’m torn…I want to continue to be mad at Nintendo, but I can’t really give them any shit. They actually listened to us for once…

As I read on Kotaku on Friday, Nintendo has changed their online service plan drastically. The biggest complaint everyone had was the one free classic game a month…that would only last a month. I didn’t sugarcoat it, I thought this was one of the most idiotic, foolish, downright fucking insane decision on Nintendo’s part. To have an online subscription where you only get a game that you can already emulate and it only lasts a month, it was downright insulting to customers when for example, this month PlayStation Plus users are getting Life is Strange and Killing Floor 2 as free games and you keep them forever as long as you’re subscribed to PS Plus!

But now, Nintendo’s completely changed their position. In a rare move for Japan, let alone just Nintendo, the online service instead will offer a set of classic games that you can play at any time, like a Netflix service. And the kicker…it’s going to cost $20 a month?! Well now, how does one criticize that? I really sat down and tried to think about what could be negative about this, the only thing I could come up with is just that you won’t see any major Nintendo Switch titles ever go on for free in the same way PlayStation Plus and Xbox Gold members get current console releases and indie games for free.

But in all honesty, what can I be mad at here? Nintendo, a Japanese game developer actually fucking listened to outrage from a non-Japanese market. Someone finally got to them, let them know how stupid the original plan was, bordering on levels as bad as the Xbox One being marketed as a glorified TV box, and the heads at Nintendo actually heard those remarks and didn’t just go “Fuck you.” to everyone! I have to applaud that, great job, Japan! Great job, Nintendo!

Does this mean I’ll buy a Switch now? Absolutely not, I still don’t see a games lineup that’s worth playing right now, to me it’s really a glorified box you can play the new Zelda on. I’m still fully under my plan of waiting at least two years for Nintendo to actually put a lineup of games on the console, not to mention buffer out all the kinks they have thus far.

But at this current moment, for the first time in a while, I’m actually thinking positive things with Nintendo and not the opposite.

It’s a weird feeling…

Mario Kart 8 Is Offensive?!

This’ll be a quick one, not as quick as me passing you in Mario Kart, but pretty quick!

So I don’t have a Nintendo Switch, so of course I haven’t played Mario Kart 8 Deluxe yet, fully equipped with new content, including the characters from Splatoon. In particular, the Inkling Girl has created quite a lot of “controversy” and by a lot, I mean none at all. But that doesn’t stop publicly traded companies from bending to the will of the easily offended, even before anything truly happened in regards to the controversy in question.

For those wondering what the Inkling Girl could have possibly done to offend people, here’s the pose in question that does so:

Oh my god! I’m so sorry you had to see that! I might as well just shut my blog down forever now, I’ve clearly offended everyone under the sun with my filthy actions. Call the cops and put me in cuffs!

Kidding aside, what you’re seeing here is just a symbolic way in some European countries, particularly Italy, to say “fuck you”. I mean…it could also just be a girl flexing her muscles and feeling said guns, or maybe, just maybe, it’s a pose. Nothing more, nothing less. Oh yeah and IT’S A FUCKING VIDEO GAME SET IN A FICTIONAL WORLD THAT HAS NO CONNECTION TO REALITY WHATSOEVER!!!

If anything, I think it’s just a shitty pose, I don’t even know what would possess someone to pose like that. Why not just pump your fist? Seems like going the extra mile to hold your bicep, that’s too much extra work for me. Hell, maybe she hurt her arm during the race? All right, I’ve got nothing left, the point is that this was an unnecessary censorship if there ever was one. If anyone was going to be “offended” by this, they’re reaching, I’m sorry but you’re reaching to the highest degree.

And besides, in a game like Mario Kart, wouldn’t it be fitting to have a “fuck you” emote anyway?

Saturday Morning Rant: ***SPOILERS***

This article is not about spoilers, I will not be spoiling anything.

(Bruce Willis’ character in The Sixth Sense is dead the entire movie)   

This rant is not dedicated to spoilers themselves, rather the ideology game companies have when it comes to YouTubers and Twitch streamers playing games and letting the public view them and thus creating the “risk of people seeing spoilers” that so many (usually Japanese) game developers get really salty and downright angry about.

Obviously the biggest example has been Atlus and Persona 5 in terms of streamers being “asked” not to stream after the 7/7 date in-game, which by the way isn’t anything special, I’ve played through it. There were other things as well, but that was the big one. As someone playing on the PS4 though, I’ve noticed I can’t even do as much as take a screenshot of a single thing in the game. I can’t screenshot a funny moment, I can’t screenshot a great moment in a cutscene, I can’t even take a screenshot of the fucking pause menu. WHAT AM I SHOWING THAT’LL AFFECT SOMEONE NEGATIVELY, ATLUS?!!!

(Sephiroth kills Aeris at the end of Disc 1 in Final Fantasy VII)

It’s another thing that just goes to show you how behind the times and how downright inept and insane Japanese gave publishers and developers are. We’ve seen SEGA ban anyone who talks about Shining Force (ironically enough, popular YouTuber TotalBiscuit just ended his 5-year long ban of SEGA games on his channel [here]), Nintendo just banning anyone for doing anything in general (see everyone) and the current offender is Atlus, another case where the non-Japan sectors of the company don’t agree with what they’re doing and wish they could change their minds, but their Japanese overlords once again could not care less about anything going on outside of Japan.

For those unaware, if you thought America thinks highly of themselves, Japan literally gives zero fucks about anyone who is not inhabiting their island. Something could sell ten times as many copies outside of Japan, but if it’s not doing well in Japan, they’ll shut the whole thing down. They only care about what’s within their own little bubble, if it’s not something originating in Japan, to some it doesn’t even exist. It’s an extremely self-righteous and idiotic way to look at things, let alone an absolutely horrendous way to do business.

But let’s get to the much more pertinent issue, shall we?

(Darth Vader is Luke Skywalker’s father in Star Wars)

It’s no secret that for some, spoilers is a major issue. Every time an episode of Game of Thrones or Walking Dead airs, people completely stay away from all social media to avoid anything that could spoil the episode for them. People tread carefully through walkthroughs and articles about games they’re playing, so they don’t come across information they might find that has something to do with something they haven’t gotten to yet. It’s completely understandable that people want to avoid that sort of thing, obviously when something is story-driven, we don’t want to know what happens before we see it ourselves.

But here’s the thing. When it comes to YouTube and Twitch, let’s be completely honest here. The people that watch these videos and streams fall into one of three categories:

  1. People who watch the first little bit of the game before the story truly kicks in as a way to decide whether they like the game or not and if they’ll end up buying the game or not.
  2. People who are already playing the game or have finished the game and want to see what other players did, such as alternate routes, different strategies and even alternate scenes/endings.
  3. People who do not intended to play the game at all and are just watching it because they like the person playing the game.

The majority of people usually fall into either #1 or #3 and the latter is where Japan falls victim to the oldest fact in the gaming industry that anyone with half a brain knows, going all the way back to the piracy days: If someone pirates a game, they weren’t going to buy it in the first place. This also falls in line with spoilers, the majority of people that are watching a Let’s Play series on YouTube or a Twitch stream that is late into a game, they’re not intending to play the game themselves and if they are, it certainly won’t be at release when it’s full price, they’re definitely waiting for the game to drop to under half-price.

(Sheik is really Princess Zelda in The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time)

It’s pretty simple anyways, folks, if spoilers bother you, don’t go looking for it. It actually isn’t that hard, I know in this day and age of social media and the internet that it seems difficult, but in actuality it’s quite easy to avoid spoilers. Just don’t go on the sites you usually go for to see articles about the spoilers you just watched. Stay off of social media, or at least don’t spend hours going through every post you see. Most importantly, don’t Google shit about it! Google is the worst for hiding spoilers!

So yeah, Atlus and every other company are out of their minds if they think “preventing spoilers” will do anything. There are always work-arounds and people will come across them anyways, no matter what you do to try and stop it. At the end of the day, just worry about how good your game is.

Persona 5 is such a good game, I could care less if I knew a spoiler here and there.